Thursday, December 3, 2009

Dear Tiger

Dear Tiger Woods,

I have been a fan since approximately 1996 when I played one season of High School golf. I still have some of my posters that hung proudly on my walls for years. My first email password included your name and I was the first person on the waiting list at the library to check out your Dad's book.

I am sure that all of this baloney in the news is a lie. Your wife was just practicing her golf swing late at night and you walked in the way. You were in such a hurry to leave the house because your baby was out of diapers and you were just heading out for a quick trip to Walgreens.

Having to explain this mayhem to my daughter Tom has been difficult. She asked why you were in so much trouble and I explained that you were a really really bad driver who crashed into all of the stationary objects on your street. Tom suggested that you get your Cup taken away as a punishment until you win another golf tournament.

I hope you and your wife can reconcile in private.

Sincerely,

Sarah

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I remember high school golf! I only joined the team (briefly) because Mr. McMurray was such a crack-up, and it was summer vacation and I was bored. I think you and I were the only girls. Those were some good times!

Patricia said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kelly said...

i am dying to know what the removed comment was!